Friday, October 26, 2012

Mister Independent



Mister Independent

09-03-2010-12-27-2010
Inspired by: Monte,
One of the most beautiful people you’ll ever lay eyes on…

I’m just a little bit too co-dependent on myself.
I keep walking down this street
Without even glancing at another soul.
I have gone through the ropes of life,
And I know just who I can count on…
Who has been there for me since day one.
And that is me, my friend.

Yet, you keep questioning my choices,
Like you’ve been my friend for ages.
I can’t ask you for help,
Cause I am far more reliable than you.
You shrug your shoulders at me,
Like you don’t have faith in my words
But, don’t take my word for it…
Watch the way I live…
And someday maybe you’ll understand…

I see so many people who get married so early,
And never know what it’s like to live on their own.
Never know what it takes in this world to survive.
Nobody wanted to date me when I was younger…
And eventually when I got into relationships
I never found a man capable of accepting me,
So I always find myself fleeing from relationships.

You keep trying to judge me
For doing what I did.
I had to make tough decisions
And stand up for myself…
Just for once in my life,
I had to grab the sword
And declare this land is mine…

Someday, you’ll have to defend yourself,
You’ll have to break away from the weak,
Oh, you’ll realize what pain  feels like…
What rage feels like,
And, then you’ll understand
Why I am this way…

Bridge
You see, I was always picked on,
And, I had few friends growing up.
I had nobody there to understand me.
And, once he put his knees into my chest,
I had to help myself up,
And learned to never rely on another being again.

Mister Independent.

Thursday, October 25, 2012

I'm Just A Little Bit Bitter



I’m Just A Little Bit Bitter
06/03/2010-07/08/2010
For Nathan

Chorus:
I’m just a little bit bitter,
You know I can’t feel the same
As long as I’m the one to blame.
I’m just a little bit bitter,
Ever since this grudge came over me,
I can’t seem to find myself anymore

I remember the day I hurt you,
It was a bad day for both of us
I made a joke, but you said I went too far,
And you never wanted to see me again.

We had a rough journey,
You were too conservative,
And I was way too liberal…
I feel bad I hurt you now,
If I could, I would apologize,
And give you a hug,
But I love myself too much.

Repeat Chorus

But, I’m not the only one to blame,
You are far from perfect.
The way you freak out over everything,
And the way you kicked me while I was down.

After awhile, it became obvious
That you wanted me more for my money,
Than you did for my art or character.
What a fool I was to fall into your traps
And not see you for what you really were.

Chorus 2:
I’m just a little bit bitter,
I can never feel the shame,
Especially when I have you to blame.
I’m just a little bit bitter
Ever since you waved goodbye,
And we ended our friendship for good.

So bitter, so bitter, since that day…

Bridge:
What I wouldn’t give to change my actions
And bring you back into my life again?
I would break out the Champaign,
Break out the fruit, and feed you all the calories you could stand.
Cause I can’t live without your positivity,
And I don’t want to try.
Please give me a second chance.

Chorus 1
Chorus 2

Friday, October 19, 2012

Conversations With Myself



Conversations With Myself
01/01/2011-01/25/2011

As I look at my reflection,
I see the truth
And it rings loud and clear…
Being an outcast is psychological…

Nobody ever attacked me,
Nobody pushed me to the curb,
I did it all to myself
And it was me who shut you out.

I go on in this life as the ultimate soloist,
And don’t mean to push people away,
But, I do just by the way I am,
By the way I have learned it should be,
And that is that the individual mind rocks,
But, a group can lead to brain-wash…
It’s better if the individual figures the world out for himself…

I use to cling to my dreams like no other,
I was positive that I would be the one,
And nobody could detract
Me from my visions…

Nowadays, the dreams have evaporated,
And I just lay below my comforter
And wonder where it all went,
And when I’ll be something again.
I reach for your hand
But you keep on getting further and further away…

I go on in this depressed world,
Just moving from loan to loan,
Never landing a job for more than ninety days,
And telling myself my behavior has been normal.
I may be pushing you away,
But inside I am screaming…
Screaming for your help,
For you to come rescue me…

It gets so hard
When you’re this independent
To accept help from others
And allow them to put food in your mouth…

Oh how I wish I could make that choice once again…

Everytime I find a job,
I get good for awhile
And then implode
And watch as it goes down in flames.

If only I could find a job that fits my personality,
I would be able to settle down in life…

But perhaps that’s not my destiny after all.

Thursday, October 18, 2012

Aaronitus



AARONITUS
07-25-2010
This one makes me laugh. ;)


Something strange has come over me,
I don’t know what I’m coming down with,
It feels like a disease in my heart,
Like a strange plague has taken hold of me. 

I am supposed to be your best friend,
But I have thoughts of carrying you into the bedroom.
How could you do this to me?
You’re the best friend I have ever had in this world,
But my heart has been infected with your disease…

Chorus:
Aaronitus is the prince of my dreams.
He comes in through my window and takes my heart from me.
You whisper my name, you kiss my lips,
But then you’re gone as soon as I open my eyes.
How can I go on like this?

I can’t feel stable,
I cannot be reliable anymore.,
I lie in bed with a fever I  can’t bring down…
There is no medicine I could possibly take for this.
Your curse is taking over me.

I thought we could be partners,
But I have visions of being conquered by you.
Feeling your masculine anatomy
Rubbing against mine
To feel you penetrating me,
To moan out in pain and pleasure.
But eventually I have to wake-up…
I have to wake up.

Repeat Chorus

Aaronitus
The legendary warrior who wouldn’t allow me to be a loner,
When I was down in life and hurting,
You gave me your horse to ride home safely and surely…

I still hold onto the hope you’ll come back again,
And listen to my promises of romance.
I hope someday you’ll give me a chance
And we can ride together…
Let’s ride together…
Please give me a chance.

Thursday, October 11, 2012

What Love Is Like For Me




What Love is Like For Me
February 2nd, 2009-February 21st, 2009
Dedicated to: Josh

Intro:
My heart is dropping again,
Your lips just taste so sweet.
When you put your arms around me,
You make me feel all warm inside.

Oh baby, Why do I do this to myself?
Get all caught up with a man after one date.
I get so excited about meeting someone new,
And exploring their mind and body.

 My legs are dangling off the bed,
And you ask me to stay with you longer,
Cause I’m the only one you need.
My legs are wrapped around you
And I’m wrestling with you,
And kissing you all over.
I’m just so whooped on you. 

Repeat Intro.

Oh baby, why do I do this myself?
Get caught up with you after just one fuck,
Now, I’m going to start texting and calling you,
And asking you when we’ll hang out again.

You put lotion on my body
And give me chills all over.
Then, you put my dick in your mouth
And make me squeal out loud.
Now you’re inside me,
And penetrating me slowly,
With your tongue in my mouth,
And, I’m asking you for more…
I’m just so whooped on you.

My heart is dropping for you baby…
I hope it works out between the two of us.

Repeat Intro.

It’s 1:45 PM
And I wake up to find you still in my arms.
You open your eyes,
And I kiss your lips again.

We both get dressed
And you walk me to my bus-stop,
And give me a hug goodbye.
I may have found the romance I always wanted.